Monday, March 30, 2009

Season Two Episode Seven


Captain's Log, date 31/03/09.

I came into an unusual situation today. I made plans to go out today, to check out an opportunity but first, breakfast. When I called for my butler, however, there was no answer. I called for the maid and again, no answer. I don't know what happened to either of them, but if I find out they've stolen away to some romantic get-away, they'll come home only to discover they've had a decrease in pay, and no cupcakes either.

Fear not, Captain's Log, for I do command knowledge of how to make breakfast. I couldn't remember where the bowls were, so I ate my cereal out of the box, by pouring in the milk... which turned out to be a little more messy than anticipated, but I made through it fine enough. I wasn't sure how long to microwave the bread for, but I thought 3 minutes was enough. It wasn't quite the same as what I'm used to, but such is the life one has to tolerate when one is "roughing it".

It turned out the the unknown where-abouts of my maid and butler was not the only surprise for the day. My driver was also gone, and my limo was no-where to be found. I had to resort to taking the bus. This proved rather difficult, as I did not know how to telephone the bus over to my house. I thought, it is a nice day so far, perhaps I'll take a bit of a stroll, and so I set off. Eventually I made it to a "bus stop", but the bus was no-where to be found. Luckily, there did happen to be a civilian standing at the "bus stop" and after a bit of prodding, finally gave me the time for which the next bus would arrive. Unfortunately I had to wait a few minutes and there was no suitable seating area. I mentioned this to the civilian, but she did not seem as upset about it as I was. I made a note of it and thought to bring it up at the next board meeting.

Finally the bus did arrive and I got on. The bus driver had the nerve to tell me that I must pay a fee, as if he didn't know who I was! I told him I had no coins on my person, that I was not some poor old woman with a change purse full of coins and buttons! He told me that I had to pay the 2 dollars or get off, so I got off, feeling quite out-raged and embarrassed, that I promptly stormed off in what I could only assume was the proper direction. I soon realised I was on my way back home, so home I went and decided I would telephone my secretary and have her pick me up instead.

I called for my butler to bring me the telephone, and remembered that he and the maid had gone missing, most likely on romantic get-away. I was not sure where the butler kept the telephone, but it proved not to be hard to find. I rang up the operator and told her to call the office for me. Apparently she was new to the job, for she did not know my office number, let alone its name and had to ask it of me. I forgave her this slight, as she was obviously new, and told her the name of my office. She dialed the number and put me through.

There was trouble completing the telephone call, and that was exactly what I was told by a prerecorded message. I hung up, called the operator again, and told her she had given me the wrong number. She read back the information she had found before, and I told her she was correct and perhaps we should try our luck again. She dialed the number again and put me through a second time. Again the prerecorded message played and again I phoned the operator. She said that the company must have changed the number or- That was when I recalled that James, the vice president, had mentioned something about making a few changes to the security. Yes, that must have been the problem! And so I waited for them to give me a ring or send over a driver. Yes, soon enough they would realise the error, that I had not received the memo, and all would be set aright.

That brings me to where we are now, dear Captain's Log. It has been nearly 10 minutes and there has not been a telephone call, nor has a driver been sent. There had been a while where I sat ready by the door, and then by the phone, but now I write to you, Captain's Log, whilst I wait. I really must end this for surely they'll try to telephone or the driver will arrive. Tah-tah!

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